Blog | Relationship Resources for Couples & Individuals

Our Comfort with Intimacy Has A Lot to do with These 7 Verbs

Love is an active verb. It’s imbued with intention and meaning and contains an implicit call to action. In the language of intimacy, basic fluency comes down to just seven verbs. The experiences that revolve around these shape our beliefs about ourselves and our expectations of others. Read more on the seven verbs of intimacy and how they help us to understand not just how we learned to love and be loved—but how we want to now.

Letters from Esther #31: Inviting Vulnerability

My monthly newsletter and workshop are meant to inspire you to reflect, act, and develop greater confidence and relational intelligence in all of your relationships. This month's theme is: Inviting Vulnerability.

In Long-Term Relationships, When Do You Find Yourself Most Drawn to Your Partner?

Reconciling the domestic and the erotic is a delicate balancing act in long-term relationships. It requires knowing your partner while recognizing their persistent mystery. Read more on the one simple question that reminds us to appreciate our partner’s otherness and what the four most common responses tell us.

Letters From Esther #30: Appreciating Otherness in Relationships

My monthly newsletter and workshop is meant to inspire you to reflect, act, and develop greater confidence and relational intelligence in all of your relationships. This month's theme is: Appreciating Otherness in Relationships.

The Other 3 Little Words: I Love You, But—What Are We?

Saying “I love you” has long been the ultimate marker of seriousness in the early months of romantic relationships. In the last few decades, however, the rise of the “situationship” has elongated the dating phase, elevating a different set of “three little words” to the pantheon of important relational dialogue. Read more on why discussing “What are we?” is an important part of creating a shared reality with healthy boundaries and expectations in a relationship.

Letters From Esther #29: New relationships are a part of life. So is ending them.

Six Essential Practices to Improve Listening Skills in Relationships

The way we listen shapes a conversation as much as the way we speak or respond. Nothing makes us feel more deeply connected than when we are engaged in a healthy balance of thoughtful speaking and hardcore listening. Read more on my six essential practices to improve listening in your relationships and learn to strike the delicate balance of receiving and reciprocating.

Letters From Esther #28: I couldn’t listen anymore and I snapped.

My monthly newsletter and workshop are meant to inspire you to reflect, act, and develop greater confidence and relational intelligence in all of your relationships. This month's theme is: Listening.

Letters From Esther #45: The Question that Comes Up in All New Adult Friendships

Letters from Esther #44: What does repair look like in relationships?

Letters from Esther #43: “Would you rather be right or be married?”

Letters From Esther #42: My Worst Valentine’s Day

Letters From Esther #41: A Practical New Year’s Resolution? Find Balance.

Looking for a more practical new year’s resolution? Find a balance between structures that ground and motivate us and guilt-free spontaneity which allows us to take risks, explore, and yes, occasionally overindulge in life’s pleasures. Read more on the importance of balancing structure and spontaneity in the new year.

Letters From Esther #40: Contemplating Hope

Letters From Esther #39: Thanksgiving & Belonging

Letters From Esther #38: How I Learned to do What I do

Finding "The One"

Does "the One" exist? And what does this phrase mean in the context of a new dating reality, with all of the choice and lack of certainty it presents?

Unsent Love Letters - Lingering Loss

In this Unsent Love Letter, the author writes to a former long-term partner who she hasn't seen for eight years. We discuss the themes of lingering loss and celebrating what once was. Read more to hear what the letter holds.

The Language of Gender: Beyond Boy and Girl

Esther explores the importance of language in our experience of gender.

What Couples Therapy Can Teach Us About Conflict in the Workplace

There are hidden relationship dimensions at play underneath the majority of interpersonal issues, whether at home or at work. Read about the three dimensions I tend to focus on, what they mean, and how they can help you better understand and manage conflict in the workplace

5 Myths We Tell Ourselves When We’re Dating

There are very few set rules for dating, especially in the ever-evolving world of modern love. But no matter how much progress we make, we still carry outdated mythologies with us, often from relationship to relationship. Correcting those myths—such as "dating should lead to marriage" and "it's about finding the one"—starts here. Read more about 5 common myths we tell ourselves when we're dating and how to reframe them.

Dating Advice for Turning a Spark into a Flame

What determines the success or disappointment of a first date? It's not all about the immediate spark. Read more to explore my dating advice that will point you away from playing games and toward creating authentic connections from the start.

When Transitioning Between Stages of a Relationship, Practice Adaptability

Adaptability in couples is about responding to life’s changing circumstances with good communication and a lot of flexibility. Read more about why adaptability is an important element in helping couples navigate the different stages of a relationship.

Relationship Stress at a High? Try Spending Time With Friends

Our expectations of our partners have never been so high. When our primary relationship is experiencing high stress one of the best things we can do for ourselves and our partners is to take some of the pressure off. Read more on the importance of spending time with friends and how it serves as a reminder that we don’t live or love in a vacuum.

Articles

Letters from Esther #61: The Art of Erotic Communication