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Letters from Esther #61: The Art of Erotic Communication

Letters from Esther #60: Reconnect to Your Erotic Self

Letters from Esther #59: “Nobody’s f*cking anymore.”

Letters From Esther #36: Fighting with your Partner about Values?

My monthly newsletter and workshop is meant to inspire you to reflect, act, and develop greater confidence and relational intelligence in all of your relationships. This month's focus is on clashing with your partner around values.

Finding Freedom in What Feels Good: 3 Reasons to Embrace Foreplay

Contrary to popular assumptions, foreplay is so much more than just the physical suggestion that kick-starts sex. Let’s adjust the lens. Read more on three reasons to embrace foreplay as the freedom to experience what feels good, for no other goal than pure pleasure—from a quick warmup to lasting erotic energy.

Letters from Esther #35: The Last Time I Felt Free…

My monthly newsletter and workshop is meant to inspire you to reflect, act, and develop greater confidence and relational intelligence in all of your relationships. This month's theme is: The feeling of freedom.

Letters From Esther #34: How Are You?

My monthly newsletter and workshop is meant to inspire you to reflect, act, and develop greater confidence and relational intelligence in all of your relationships.

How to Write Wedding Vows That Set Your Marriage Up For Success

Vows that set a marriage up for success trade promises to do it all for intentions to do our best—especially in the hard times. Anyone who’s been married can tell you that, for all of the joy and love, there’s just as many fights and betrayals. The question is: how will we repair and grow stronger each time? Vows are an opportunity to address this very question. And, when done well, vows can be a compass to return to every time we lose our way. Read more on how to trade promises for intentions and a beautiful writing exercise for wedding vow drafts or as an ongoing activity do to throughout your marriage.

Letters From Esther #33: Making and Breaking Wedding Traditions

My monthly newsletter and workshop is meant to inspire you to reflect, act, and develop greater confidence and relational intelligence in all of your relationships. This month's theme is: Making and Breaking Wedding Traditions.

The Myth of Unconditional Love in Romantic Relationships

“Relational Ambivalence” is the experience of contradictory thoughts and feelings—of love and hate, attraction and disgust, excitement and fear, contempt and envy—toward someone with whom we are in a relationship. It exists in every relational configuration, but we put a lot of pressure on romantic love, in particular, to rise above it. Read more on how ambivalence shows up in your romantic relationships and the common responses to it.

Letters from Esther #32: Should I Stay or Should I Go?

My monthly newsletter and workshop is meant to inspire you to reflect, act, and develop greater confidence and relational intelligence in all of your relationships. This month's theme is: Relational Ambivalence.

Letters from Esther #61: The Art of Erotic Communication

My monthly newsletter is meant to inspire you to reflect, act, and develop greater confidence and relational intelligence in all of your relationships.

Letters from Esther #60: Reconnect to Your Erotic Self

My monthly newsletter is meant to inspire you to reflect, act, and develop greater confidence and relational intelligence in all of your relationships.

Letters from Esther #59: “Nobody’s f*cking anymore.”

My monthly newsletter is meant to inspire you to reflect, act, and develop greater confidence and relational intelligence in all of your relationships.

Letters from Esther #58: Introducing The Arc of Love

My monthly newsletter is meant to inspire you to reflect, act, and develop greater confidence and relational intelligence in all of your relationships.

Letters from Esther #57: “What if I break up with my dad?”

My monthly newsletter is meant to inspire you to reflect, act, and develop greater confidence and relational intelligence in all of your relationships.

Letters from Esther #56: “I miss you and I’m happy you’re gone.”

My monthly newsletter is meant to inspire you to reflect, act, and develop greater confidence and relational intelligence in all of your relationships.

Letters From Esther #55: Welcome to my office. No, really.

My monthly newsletter is meant to inspire you to reflect, act, and develop greater confidence and relational intelligence in all of your relationships.

Letters from Esther #54: Curiosity is a balm for loneliness.

My monthly newsletter is meant to inspire you to reflect, act, and develop greater confidence and relational intelligence in all of your relationships.

Feeling Alone in a Relationship? You’re not alone.

Loneliness isn’t new, but it’s also no longer just about being socially isolated. Over the last decade, we’ve experienced a new type of loneliness—the loss of connection, trust, and capital while we are next to the person with whom we’re not supposed to be lonely. Read more about feeling alone in a relationship, how it's intensified in the midst of crisis, and what you can do to reconnect.

Infidelity: Why I Wrote a Book About America's Most Controversial Topic

I knew that writing my new book The State of Affairs would be met with strong reactions on all sides. So why step into the fire?

How to Fix the Fights You're Sick of Having

Esther writes about the fights that are all too common in our relationships.

Looking for the Perfect Fit? Pros & Cons of Relationship Checklists

Are your relationship checklists doing you more harm than good? Read more on how to make your relational pros and cons list work for you and when to loosen the grip.

4 Practices for Hopefulness in the New Year

Where does hope come from—and how do we practice it?‍ Read more on four practices for hopefulness in the new year, and beyond.

How to Write Wedding Vows That Set Your Marriage Up For Success

Vows that set a marriage up for success trade promises to do it all for intentions to do our best—especially in the hard times. Anyone who’s been married can tell you that, for all of the joy and love, there’s just as many fights and betrayals. The question is: how will we repair and grow stronger each time? Vows are an opportunity to address this very question. And, when done well, vows can be a compass to return to every time we lose our way. Read more on how to trade promises for intentions and a beautiful writing exercise for wedding vow drafts or as an ongoing activity do to throughout your marriage.

5 Ways to Start Conversations with Confidence

Small talk of all kinds is an unavoidable part of life. And, when done well, it can be a sweet, touching, and thrilling experience. It’s a bridge between your life and the lives of others. If you’re nervous about the idea of talking to a stranger—or an acquaintance or colleague that you haven’t seen in awhile—this guide is for you. Read more on how to start conversations with confidence.

What Does it Mean to be a Man?

A reader asks about how to handle his feelings of inadequacy after circumstances force him to become a stay-at-home dad.

You can also browse articles, Letters from Esther, and Podcast Episodes in our “Focus On” sections, where we group resources based on important relational topics.

Communication and Connection

Security vs. Freedom

Intimate Relationships